Friday, 1 August 2014
Life: You want a Love Marriage or a happy life?
We were in I.T class room, my white bearded, highly respectable teacher just came in and greeted us. This teacher seldom laughed, he was very serious, wise and super religious. That day he startled us by a very strange question which had nothing to do with computers. He asked, “What is that one thing our generation’s marriages had which you don’t find today?”
‘Blink, blink’ no one answered. He said with a Mona Lisa smile, “Commitment, these days we have love marriages but no commitments.”
Although it was enough surprise to hear a relationship advice coming from an I.T teacher on the other hand he was right. The older No-Love marriages lasted a lifetime. Today when love is in the air, how many love marriages have you seen having their happily ever after? I have seen NONE. As they say life is no fairy tale. When the bachelor carefree life leaves, so does their love.
Love is not enough to live a happy life, and by that I don’t mean money is… No, Money comes and goes never worry about it. The second vital thing a married couple needs after love is PROBLEM SOLVING ABILITY. Funny how we thought Mathematics problems were a headache.
Step one: the Problem
Relationship problems require more patience and a lot of other skills. First is the Analytical skill, the skill to identify the problem. I have seen couples fight over a problems they never have figured out. Sad part is mostly they both don’t want to find out the problem in the first place. Remember to solve any chaos in life you’d first have to identify the problem and lay it on the table for all to see.
Step Two: Communicate
After you have found the problem openly talk about it to your partner. Show them that you care enough to ask their opinion and are ready to make some efforts. Once you have confirmed the problem be polite and use your communication skills. This is a critical stage hence always be honest, say what you need to say. Truth is not bitter if said in the right way, RIGHT TONE and on the right time.
Step Three: Solution
Last step is finding the solution. Creative people never fall short for solutions in life no matter what situation they are in. If you both are creative you’d find a wonderful way out of the problem in no time.
On the contrary when only one of you creatively leads the relationship then a little more patience is advised. If you can’t help solve the problem then at least help your significant other by not giving up and having faith in them. Most importantly don’t advertise your problems. Why would you want to burden your partner when they are already going thought hell to make you happy?
Scarier than that if you are that creative person who is making all the efforts to save the marriage. Then hang on buddy, there is always a solution. Giving up may seem the easier option but easier is not always the right option. I wish you both a Disney like happily ever after... =)